It’s been awhile. I’m in New Hampshire doing a travel contract. I’ve section hiked over 100 miles of the the Appalachian Trail up here. It’s beautiful, challenging terrain. I’m alive and loving life to the full. I’m Ministering to people on the trail and in the operating room. I’m spending quality time with my friend Jesus in the wilderness. I just write these thoughts below and thought maybe you’d like to think them as well

I became a nurse when I was 22. I was angry at God in those days, not on speaking terms with him at all. I was 42 when I gave my life to him. And then this verse became my song — “Then I heard the Lord say,

“Whom shall I send? Who will be our messenger?” I answered, “I will go! Send me!”” Isaiah 6:8 GNT

It’s been my song ever since. I used to think I had to do great things for God, to make up for all the years I let him down. I went on a bunch of missions trips until I burned out. When I finally understood grace, I heard him say I was enough just being me, being still at his feet, always ready, always willing. He’s a good good Father. ♥️♾

Unconditionally – m


Unconditional Cheerleader

When I was 12 years old, I wanted to be a cheerleader. I can’t remember the details of how I found out about the try outs, but I signed up, went to the camp where I learned the cheers, practiced, and then tried out. I made the squad for 7th grade… as an alternate. Raub Junior High Indians. I didn’t get to wear the regular uniform. I wore this really cute mascot costume, with moccasins and feather. My pride made me feel less than, not good enough. Then my pride made me complain about the experience for all of 7th grade. I didn’t want to participate in any of the cheerleader extracurricular events that solidify a team. At the age of 12/13, I was not a team player. From my perspective, I saw those girls as being silly and snobby toward others. I saw them look down on others who weren’t cool enough to be cheerleaders. I didn’t like what I saw because I saw others as being equally special and important. My junior high cheerleading career may have ended after only 1 season, but my lifetime cheerleading career developed and is strong.

Son#2 married the girl of his dreams this past weekend. The day was absolutely beautiful. The weather was overcast. Processing my emotions is always a challenge. Milestones leave me feeling joy and grief at the same time. Milestones are signposts marking the end of one era, the beginning of the next. If I’m not careful, I get stuck at the sign for too long, looking back on all that has been, feeling like I’ve lost instead of gained, longing to go back and do it again.

But my sons are men now. And as a friend pointed out to me recently, I have successfully led them through childhood to adulthood, which is exactly what a parent hopes to accomplish. As their personal cheerleader, and biggest fan, I did it!

When I feel sad, I have to keep reminding myself that the milestone isn’t just an ending, it’s also a beginning. My cheerleader skills are still needed. This life isn’t over yet. It’s just beginning.

Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” John 8:12 ESV