receptionist’s log: final edition – the lessons

Poston, Arizona. Laura Mukogawa, Beauty shop r...

Poston, Arizona. Laura Mukogawa, Beauty shop receptionist – NARA – 536653 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I officially became a summertime receptionist on  the 4th of June. I want to thank God for bringing me through to the other side 8 weeks later. Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a small list of lessons I learned from this summertime job:

  1. People have questions, a lot of questions
  2. People will ask questions I don’t have answers for
  3. I do not like not having answers
  4. This makes me very uncomfortable
  5. The Africa Mercy gets a lot of phone calls
  6. See number 3 above
  7. I am good with lists and printing forms
  8. I actually like monitoring the fire panel
  9. I particularly like talking to the duty officers via radio
  10. The last three things do not qualify me for the very important title of receptionist

This has been the most challenging job I’ve ever had. Being  receptionist on the Africa Mercy requires skills I just don’t have. A receptionist needs to be cheerful at all times. Cheerful is not an adjective I would ever use to describe myself. I believe the gift of hospitality is also a strong character trait of a receptionist. Again, a big fat zero for me.

But through this job, God has been faithful to show me I also have an issue with repressing my feelings. He’s showing me I seriously need to work on and overcome this issue if I want to do more than survive here. So even though it’s been a long, challenging summer, I have no doubt it’s been the summer I was meant to have. God does not make mistakes!

Thanks for coming along for the receptionist’s log ride!

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

I want the cynic in me to die an everlasting death…

On 11/12/2005, at the age of 42, I called on the name of the Lord. I have been walking with Him ever since. It’s been an amazing adventure. Following the Lord is not for the faint hearted. It takes a lot of courage to admit you can’t change without Him. It takes a lot of courage to ask Him to be changed. But that’s exactly what I have asked for. When you ask God to change you, be prepared. He doesn’t want to change just a little bit. He wants to change all of it!

Hi! My name is Michelle. I am a sinner in need of a Savior. I am a cynic in need of a Savior who will break my heart and tear down the granite wall that I built around it. As I prepare to embark on my greatest adventure with the Lord yet, I am praying for Him to utterly destroy the cynic. I want Him to take every hideous thing in my heart and crush it, the whining, the complaining, the pessimistic, the gossiping. I might have a cute facade, but it isn’t good enough anymore. I want all these bad traits to be stripped away from my heart and soul so that I shine with a brightness that will require others to wear shades. Not for me, but all for the glory of my God and Savior! I want people to know there is a God in heaven who loves them with an everlasting love! As long as the cynic lives in me, they won’t see Him the way I do. As long as the cynic lives in me, the light will be dimmer than it should be.

I ask all of you, the people I love and who love me back, to join with me in praying for God to destroy the cynic in me. I know He can do it. He can do anything! He alone is worthy! To God be the glory both now and forever! Amen!

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

can we ever really change?

1 John 4:20 If someone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? 21 And this commandment we have from Him: that he who loves God must love his brother also.

There is just stuff about my personality that is fundamentally wrong. I think it must be from years of not knowing God and following Him. But how can it ever possibly change? I carry such bad feelings inside my heart. I don’t want to be snarky or sarcastic or cynical anymore. How can that go away? I can’t make it go away. If God doesn’t take it away from me, I’m afraid it will never go away. My friends tell me I’ve grown a lot and come a long way since they met me, but have I really? Or am I just putting on a good show for them?

Search my heart God! Find those things in me that need to be dealt with and destroyed. I don’t want to look at people I don’t like with contempt anymore. I want to look at them and be filled with compassion. How can I have the gift of mercy for some and not for all? How can I say I know you and love you and look at a man or woman with disgust? I am deceived. I say I have the love of the Father, but I still look at people with contempt and anger. Oh God, don’t let me stay this way! Teach me how to love the way you love. Break my heart with the things that break your heart. Please don’t let me ignore the marginal anymore. I used to see them and be filled with compassion. What’s happened to my heart?

His… Michelle