five minute friday_leave_day 31

Is there anything worse than leaving?

I suppose it depends. I’m happy to leave this month behind, with all its emotional ups and downs and challenges.

I’m not happy to leave the people I love behind. It takes a toll on me, brings me to a place I don’t like, leaves me feeling lost, lonely.

I’m happy at the end of a busy work day, to leave the stress behind.

I’m not happy to leave the comfort of my bed, when the light breaks and it’s time to start all over.

I’m happy to leave this writing challenge behind, to move on to something new.

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

This is day 31 of #Write31Days and Five Minute Friday.

All posts can be found here.

transformed by renewing my mind_day 20

I miss joy. I miss excitement. I miss contentment.

I don’t feel like doing anything. Everyday, I seem to be dragging myself through the motions of life.

When will it end?

How long will this keep going on?

I feel so blah.

I’m so tempted to stop taking this medication, to go back to the extreme emotions of before just so I can feel something other than this.

But I don’t miss the pressure build up in my brain that makes me feel like my head might explode. I don’t miss freaking out over normal daily stresses of my job and life. I don’t miss waking up multiple times at night to look at the clock.

Maybe I’m overreacting? Maybe I need to call the doctor this week and see if she can add a little something else to this prescription cocktail? Or maybe I should just go back to being my unmedicated, crazy self, good, bad, and ugly?

I’m starting to wonder if there is really any hope for my poor brain.

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

This is day 20 of #Write31Days.

All posts can be found here.