transformed by renewing my mind_day 23

One year ago, I said goodbye to a dream. I left Africa because the Lord said it was time for me to go home. I left people I loved, who loved me too, impossible me.

It has not been an easy transition for me, this coming home. Sometimes I still feel like a displaced person, not knowing where I belong.

I’m still having trouble accepting the Lord’s plan for me right now. It all seems so unimportant next to the dream of Africa. But this is not the way to think. Life carries on regardless of where I am.

And this kind of thinking is purely selfish as I know my family is very happy to have me here.

Last year, the Lord said come home, rest for a year, take care of yourself. Well, the year is up. I sure do hope He has something amazing for me to do this next year. I sure hope He puts a new dream in my heart, a new idea.

Here I am Lord!

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

This is day 23 of #Write31Days.Also sharing with the Thought Provoking Thursday crowd.

All posts can be found here.

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Q & A With Micey IV

This one comes from Tom.

How can I quit my job and help others in need?

I’m not entirely sure how you can quit your job Tom since I don’t know you personally. But I can tell you how I quit mine. 🙂

This dream to work for Mercy Ships didn’t happen overnight. I was basically doing what all Americans do. Work, get paid, buy stuff, pay rent, go on vacation, buy more stuff, get into debt, repeat. I was doing this from the time I graduated from college in 1985 until 2008. Living “the dream” so to speak.

In 2006, the Lord put this little idea into my head, go be a missionary in Africa. How in the world is that going to happen?

In 2008, I went on a one week mission trip to Haiti. I was hooked. I knew the first thing I had to do was get out of debt. I never cared about being in debt until that one week in Haiti.

I made a serious plan to get out of debt. I also began to look for a missions organization to work for. I joined one in 2009 that seemed good. Between them and my church, I learned how to start raising support, no easy task. I basically took on raising support as another job. Raising support takes humility, courage, enthusiasm, time, and perseverance.

Things didn’t really click completely until Mercy Ships. Even then it wasn’t until I had actually come to the ship for 6 months last year that my enthusiasm and commitment exploded. Suddenly, raising support became less of a burden because I’m so behind what I’m doing here in Africa.

So Tom, I quit my job in bits and pieces. I went from working full time to travel nursing to staff relief. I also have 2 boys I had to encourage toward independence at the same time. It’s been a real process.

Last but not least is faith. It takes real faith to trust that God is going to make sure I have enough to work here. He’s the one who asked me to do this for Him. He is my Employer. I work for His glory. I confess I still struggle with fear of not having enough, of being stranded in Africa with no way to pay for the things I need. But God is faithful even when I’m faithless. I really believe I’ll be here as long as He wants me to be here.

One last thing:

Matthew 19
16 And behold, a man came up to him, saying, “Teacher, what good deed must I do to have eternal life?” 17 And he said to him, “Why do you ask me about what is good? There is only one who is good. If you would enter life, keep the commandments.” 18 He said to him, “Which ones?” And Jesus said, “You shall not murder, You shall not commit adultery, You shall not steal, You shall not bear false witness, 19 Honor your father and mother, and, You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” 20 The young man said to him, “All these I have kept. What do I still lack?” 21 Jesus said to him, “If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” 22 When the young man heard this he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions.

Hope I answered your question sufficiently. 😀

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

Working hard. Saving lives.

dreaming…

Everyone dreams. It’s part of the sleep cycle. I generally don’t remember my dreams. After my dad died, he would visit me in my dreams. I would always wake up crying because I knew he was dead. I was happy and sad to see him all at the same time. My dad died 33 years ago. Over the years, the dreams gradually tapered off. But this morning, just before waking up, he came. He was singing an old hymn. I don’t remember exactly which hymn. I know it was something like Praise God from whom all blessings flow… I remember saying out loud I didn’t know you knew any praise songs! Then my dad said something I’m sure was encouraging me about going to Africa. It began with him saying, remember the words of Martin Luther King Jr… Then I woke up. Tears were falling from my eyes. The same happy/sad feeling 33 years later. My dad never went to church. I didn’t get a chance to really know him because I was a kid when he died. I don’t know what he believed in. But when I woke up this morning, my tears were more happy than sad. I believe God let me see my dad in heaven, praising him. I know God fulfills my dreams. This is faith.

Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20