Writing my life story has taken a toll on my mind. I am grieving things I never grieved before and it is as if the Lord is searching every wicked corner of my heart and bringing to the surface all of the things I refused to face in the past. He is purging every last wicked deed I ever committed, opening an abscess that was never drained before, so that I might be healed. It is a very humbling experience to share these secrets with the public, to share them with myself and to share them with the Lord. I know the Lord knows these secrets already because I cannot possibly hide from Him, but to confess them to you and to myself has brought me to my knees with renewed gratitude. I can see so clearly how wicked I was as I write my life and I cry with awe and wonder and amazement and astonishment that He would forgive me and allow me to repent and be adopted into His family! Who am I that the Lord would look down on me, an evil sinner, and even acknowledge my existence?
My prayer is for my story to help you in some small way, to show you how merciful our God is, to help you realize you too can be saved by God’s grace. If you seek Him, you will find Him!
The LORD looks down from heaven on the children of man,to see if there are any who understand, who seek after God.
May all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you!May those who love your salvation say evermore, “God is great!”
Seek the LORD and his strength; seek his presence continually!
“Seek the LORD while he may be found;call upon him while he is near;
2 Chronicles 7:14
if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.