When you were a child, did you ever wish you could be the girl with braces? Or the girl with glasses? Or the girl with the cast? I did. What’s up with that? I never had the braces. I ended up with the glasses. And tomorrow I’ll get the cast. But now that I’m older and wiser, I’d like to take those wishes back.
With all this free time on my hands to think, I’ve been contemplating these childhood wishes. I think they came from feeling invisible. I had this love hate relationship with visibility. I wanted to be seen. I wanted to be loved. I wanted to be popular. Yet I was bad at handling the attention. And when the attention was negative? Like when the boys in 6th grade noticed my misshapen left ear and nicknamed me peanut ear? It was all I could do to make myself invisible again. Gosh we can be mean to each other. And sadly, it was the mean things I believed most of all.
When I met Jesus 11 years ago, I began a journey to visibility again. It’s been a challenging journey. Exchanging the lies for truth. For believing what God has to say about me instead of people. It’s been a slow journey too. But I’m happy to report that now I believe truth more than lies. And this comes from knowing I am loved by the Creator of the universe who came looking for me when I was hopelessly lost. I was never invisible to him.
Having a broken ankle isn’t fun and it makes me visible. I really want to handle the attention well so that it brings God glory. Because he deserves the glory. He was with me on that mountain. He caught me when I fell. He rescued me through the amazing volunteers from Pinal County. He blessed me with a free helicopter ride. He took care of me in surgery by giving the surgeon the tools necessary to put my ankle back together. He provided the facility to have surgery. He made sure my team was the team with the most compassion. He placed my cat in my lap as a constant comfort, as if he is holding me himself. He has been in every detail of this journey from the beginning. How marvelous! How wonderful! Is the Lord to me!
3 We also have joy with our troubles, because we know that these troubles produce patience. 4 And patience produces character, and character produces hope. (Romans 5:3-4 NCV)