I’m a runner. But not the physical fitness kind. It’s the fight or flight kind of running I’m known for.
Its been my natural propensity to run. From life, problems, confrontation, conflict, people, intimacy, relationship, God.
When my dad died, I ran from God. When my debt got out of control, I hid from creditors. When hiding from them didn’t work anymore, I filed for bankruptcy and ran to Florida.
There’s a funny little mechanism we’re all born with that’s activated in a crisis. Scientists call it the fight or flight mechanism.
It takes a lot for me to stand and fight. It takes unimaginable strength to stand and fight. Before Jesus, it was me against the world. Without God on my side, I had a very hard time standing to fight.
It took every ounce of my strength to fight for my big kid when he fell into this giant black hole of trouble and despair. The money problems just didn’t seem worth fighting over, so I ran from them.
Now I’m facing a bit of a battle again. With the IRS of all things. They want me to pay taxes on money I didn’t earn. And they want me to do all the work to fix the problem. They obviously think I have all the time in the world Ha!
I’m faced with a fight or flight situation. I confess I have had moments of tremendous fear over this. But then God taps me on the shoulder. He reminds me I’m in the right, to trust Him, to stand.
Would you be so kind as to pray for me to have courage? Thanks!