Ready For The Transition To Be Complete

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Linking up with Spiritual Sundays

I’ve been in Congo for 44 days. I’ve been back on the ship for 158 days, almost 6 months. I’m ready for the transition to be complete. I’m ready to be smiling and having fun most days. I’m ready to stop being homesick. I’m ready to stop being depressed. I’m ready and yet I’m still here.

I’m still homesick, particularly when I get a text from a boy saying I miss you! I can’t handle the I miss you texts. They break my heart. I’m trying so hard to keep a stiff upper lip, hanging on by a thread, and then the text comes. I dissolve into a flood of tears.

When will this sadness leave? How long will it take? I feel really stuck. I would really like to have a day filled with laughter. One. Whole. Day. Is that too much to ask for?

I can’t even stand my own ramblings. How can I inflict myself on others?

How long God?

His… Michelle
Philippians 1:20

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10 thoughts on “Ready For The Transition To Be Complete

  1. I feel for you, micey. Homesickness is no fun. I hope and pray your joy returns very soon. When I read this a comment our dear missionary lady in India made when asked how she could go to India and stay 60 years. She said it was only because she thought that was where God wanted her to be. I know you believe you are where God wants you to be. I know you are a tough lady. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have accepted the challenge in the first place.
    Love and blessings,
    Charlotte

    • Thank you Charlotte. I do believe I am where God wants me to be. At least I’m pretty sure. But as time goes by, I wonder if I heard him right? I didn’t expect doubt to return.

  2. I appreciate even these “ramblings” as you call them Michelle. sounds a lot like some of the psalms to me. I appreciate how you keep it real.One of the reasons I read your post. DM

  3. Dear Micey
    You are NOT inflicting yourself on us or anyone for that matter, dear friend. You are honoring us by sharing your burdens with us. You give us the great, holy privileged to help carry your burdens. My friend, if you feel like unloading a bit more, please email me. I would love to be there for you for you are my sister and I love you.
    Blessings XX
    Mia

  4. Praying…for your homesickness…for joy to return…for you to feel the arms of your very best Friend to surround you with such love that your depression lifts. He cares!

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